Just days after Jennifer Lopez appeared on American Idol…word around the street is that Jenny from the Block and her hubby Marc Anthony are headed for splitsville.

Marc Anthony and JLo are perfect for eachother, I mean, he's short and ugly and she's tall and pretty. They fill eachother's lackings.

Apparently, Marc Anthony is a leech. He follows her everywhere she goes and is too "controlling". Now, if I were to judge them by how they LOOK/APPEAR, Marc Anthony DOES look like the type that would want his woman on lockdown, but then again, Jennifer Lopez looks like she could eat little Marc Anthony with one ass cheek–have you seen the size of JLo's butt, booty, ass, badunkadunk… whatever you wanna call it? This woman looks like she's not gona let any man run her, because she's already sucked the life of out him (literally…have you seen the way Mark Anthony looks? He looks like he just died and then came back to life all of a sudden) with her demanding ways.

Since I'm a highly qualified "judge a book by it's cover" analyst, and a full certified misanthropist, and all I have to say to these rumors is: BULL SHIT!

There is another Jennifer Lopez album coming out. Enough said. 

Clearly, JLo's photos look 100% better and more alive than Marc Anthony's. JLo glows and Marc just stands there like a dumb ass.

 

It's the rebirth of Jennifer Lopez… why? Because she has finally "grown more sure" of who she is.  Mrs. Jennifer Lopez Anthony doesn't want to be called J.Lo anymore.

Didn't she name herself J.Lo when she was going out with Puff Daddy… I don't even know what he calls himself these days: Puffy, P.Diddy, Diddy, Didd, Pidy?

"I'm not J.Lo any more. That's all gone with all the ridiculous stories about tantrums and Egyptian sheets. That's all my past." –Jennifer Lopez

"I'm Jennifer Lopez. I think, as a woman, I've finally grown more sure of who I am. It does seem ironic that it has taken me more than a decade to basically get back to who I am." –Jennifer Lopez

 

Rumor has it that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are splitting up. I really like them together. I mean, shes tall and pretty and he's short and ugly, and short (did I say this already?) and looks like he died and then came back to life.

Ok! Magazine's cover story this month is that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are about to split because he's SMOTHERING her and he's too controlling.

The girl could eat this little man with one ass cheek (have you SEEN the size of J Lo's ass?)

Could you tell the way a person is by looking at them? I guess, "judging them by their cover"…cause I tried, and Marc Anthony does seem like the type that follows his woman around and wants her on lock down. BUT THEN AGAIN, if I were to do the same analysis of Jennifer Lopez, she looks like the type of woman who would suck the life (and money) out of you and run her man.

So, from my experience of being a highly qualified "judging a book by it's cover" critic, and full out misanthropist, I think that these rumors are a load of crap. There is a new Jennifer Lopez album coming out and this is probably just a publicity stunt.

Magazines need to talk about something we haven't heard about in a while… like maybe… Britney Spears? heh.

 

Name: Jennifer Lopez 

Birth Date: July 24, 1970

Height: 5' 6"

Occupation: Singer/Songwriter, Actress

Quote: "People equate sexy with promiscuous. They think that because I'm shaped this way, I must be scandalous – like running around and bringing men into my hotel room. But it's just the opposite."

Mispellings: Jeniffer Lopez, Jenniffer Lopez, Jennifer Lopes, Jennefer Lopez, Jennifer Lopaz, Jenifer Lopes,  Jennifere Lopez

Pictures of Jennifer Lopez: